Monday, October 04, 2010

Do You Believe Me Now?

Now that our children are reasonably grown up and no longer living in our home, my very kind-hearted wife, Sarah – a lifelong and dedicated Democrat - and I have reached a compromise regarding the evening news. I stated, ‘Not MSNBC.’ She stated, ‘Not Fox.’ Our conclusion (and, yes, I bent over backwards) was CNN.
So this evening, over a most delicious bowl of minestrone that Sarah had prepared, we tuned in CNN. Much to my astonishment we learned that Eliot Spitzer was going to be a host on a brand new show – presenting news and commentary on the state of our union and our world. As the kids say, ‘OMG!’
There is one relationship on the face of this earth by which a man and a woman can be judged on issues of truth, trust and discernment: marriage. This man has failed on each.
So now, in their wisdom, this so-called bastion of truth, trust, justice and fairness has hired a lying, secretive, dodging, elitist, political, wife-cheating son-of-a-bitch – paid him a salary, gave him center stage – and expects us to tune in and believe him! Will the feminists please rise up with me and bring this guy down within the first week? Of course they won’t! He will deliver the crooked news of liberal politics for them! He will be their hero! He will skew the news to fit their needs. But he fundamentally and irrevocably used and tread upon women in the most repulsive manner. Both a wife (with whom he committed to an eternal bond) – and a prostitute (with whom he had a momentary and monetary contract.) Can you not see that? Can you not understand that this man is not to be trusted?
And now we are expected to hear the truth from him?
The compromise is over. I think from this night forward my Beloved Sarah and I will watch The Dog Whisperer. Dogs are very faithful. They can be trusted. I wish they could talk. They could deliver the news – and I would listen.


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